Well, after ten hours of traveling by feet, pickup-taxi (a pickup with bench seats in the back), ferry, bus, and skytrain, I’m back in Bangkok, enjoying the dubious pleasures of exhaust fumes, traffic, and tuktuk drivers. I must admit, I’m grumpy: I wanted a few more days in Ko Chang, hanging out on the beach. 🙂

I carved myself a set of size 3 double-pointed knitting needles out of bamboo yesterday–they’re actually quite nice. Bamboo turns out to be remarkably cooperative for making long thin objects: it splits readily and evenly, and is soft enough to carve easily, yet very tough/flexible. Perfect, in fact, for knitting needles.

I split one piece of bamboo into six pieces (one didn’t work out, so I have five dpns), shaped the pieces to be round and about the right size, then tied a loop of string around my size 3 circular needles (for sizing) and carved the needles down to fit precisely through the loop, thus getting exact sizing. The finished needles are very serviceable, and I actually like them better than commercial needles–I made mine with thin points instead of the conventional fat ones, which makes knitting silk much easier. I took along another piece of bamboo, and am tempted to make myself another set, and ditch the “bought” needles entirely.

Having carved myself a set of knitting needles and spun some yarn, I’ve now started knitting my lace shawl. It’s in blue/purple/turquoise silk, and so far I’m knitting it in a simple, eight-armed spiral pattern. I’ve got a 4″ diameter circle already and it is just beautiful–delicate and open, with just a bit of silk shimmer. (Yes, I’ll try to get a photo.)

Later today I’m going to sit down and design the rest of the shawl–I think it will just be a series of spirals, emanating from the center. Simple, pretty, and easy to remember, which is important since I expect I’ll do most of my knitting on a lurching ferry in the pouring rain (yesterday), or sitting on my pack by the side of the road waiting for a pickup-taxi to fly by (also yesterday). Complex, hard-to-remember patterns and traveling don’t really mix.

I also made a friend on the way back! I was sitting in the bus station at Trat, spinning while waiting for the 2pm bus, when a middle-aged Thai woman pointed at the spindle and asked (using gestures) what it was for. I demoed spinning silk thread on it, then pulled out the partially-knitted shawl and showed her the lace pattern. She loved the lace, but was absolutely fascinated by the spindle–so I pulled out my spare whorl, pulled off a little bit of silk, and taught her to spin! It was a little interesting because we had no language in common (she didn’t speak English and I don’t speak Thai), but it’s amazing what you can communicate with gestures. She picked it up very quickly. (Much faster than I did, truth be told.) I was impressed–silk is not the easiest fiber to learn spinning on, but she was doing great.

Anyway, I showed her how to spin singles and ply them together into a finished yarn, and made a gift of my spare spindle whorl. (This leaves me with only one whorl, which is a little worrisome, but I figure I can always carve or make another. I’d rather teach a new spinner than lug around an extra whorl, anyway.) We traded addresses–I’m not sure how we’re going to correspond since we don’t have a common language, but I’m sure I can dig up someone who speaks Thai, back in the States, and if not I’m sure she knows someone who speaks English. I gave her the URL for some American spinning suppliers, and will send her some of the acrylic and wool fibers that Mr. Wu gave me when touring the spinning factory. I figure that should give her enough to practice on for now–once I get to Chiang Mai perhaps I can dig up some silkweavers, and connect her up to them.

Anyway, I’m quite happy both about having met her and having finally “mastered” the art of communicating in gestures. It’s not hard, but it requires a totally different mindset–instead of thinking (and communicating) complex concepts, you have to limit yourself to a much simpler mental vocabulary, and accept that there are some things you’re just never going to know. (For example, buying batteries is easy, but asking “What are the cultural underpinnings behind a three-headed elephant?” is right out.)

I’m also happy to have found the right “medium” for starting conversations, i.e. the drop spindle. It’s interesting to watch people’s reactions to it–it definitely breaks a boundary. Instead of another faceless foreign backpacker, you’re suddenly someone!–a person who’s doing something interesting. And drop spindles are endlessly fascinating because of their deceptive simplicity–it’s just a little disc impaled on a stick, that spins suspended in midair, and magically turns loose fiber into thread. It’s so deceptively simple that almost everyone wants to try it.

So, last night when I got in, I asked the guesthouse keeper (who speaks fluent English) if she can find a woodworker to make me five or six extra whorls–that way I can teach people and give away spindles as I go. I think it, and the lace shawl, will also stand me in excellent stead once I get to Chiang Mai and the weavers–they’re used to foreign tourists, certainly, but even the most jaded craftsperson will be excited by the prospect of a new craft (trust me on this 😉 ). And knitting is not at all common in Thailand, nor is handspinning. So I think it will make an excellent conversation-starter.

Shifting gears, I’m now worrying a bit about malaria. Despite the advice of a travel doc that I’d be OK until Chiang Mai, I just read in the guidebook that Ko Chang is considered a malarial area of Thailand, so i should have been taking antimalarials. Oops. I’ve fired off an email to the guy asking him to check the latest report. In the meanwhile, I think I’ll probably start takign doxycycline, just in case. I didn’t have huge problems with mosquitoes while I was in Ko Chang, but I did get bitten pretty liberally at dawn/dusk. If I’d known, I would have used Deet. Oh well. I think I’ll be OK as long as I start taking antimalarials now, but there’s not much I can do post facto. (Terri-san: any suggestions?)

That’s all for now–today I’m going to run some errands, and tonight I’m going to the expat party, to try talking the body painter into a studio session. 🙂 Not sure about the next few days–maybe the old capital, maybe investigate Bangkok a little, depends what turns up (and who I meet) at the party.

Towards the end of the month I’m going south, for a ten-day meditation retreat at Wat Suon Mok, a temple in southern Thailand. Tentatively, I’ll be flying into Myanmar/Burma Nov 15 for a ten-day guided tour (which will include their Festival of Balloons–seems roughly akin to the Rose Parade but with hot air balloons)–but I haven’t gotten a full quote from the travel agent yet, so I may change my plans depending on what they’re asking. There are, after all, still Vietnam, Cambodia, and Laos to see, not to mention India and the rest of Thailand. 🙂

Today was relatively uneventful. I met with the 63-year-old Chinese guy, who turns out to be a troubleshooter/plant technical expert for a yarn factory. After a Chinese buffet lunch in which he stuffed me unmercifully (I had forgotten that Chinese hospitality involves feeding your guests more than they can eat), I showed him how to spin on a bottom-whorl drop spindle, a top-whorl drop spindle, and a supported spindle (I made myself a spindle that converts to all three, it’s not hard).

It turns out the guy is an inventor, is planning on retiring in the next year or two, and is trying to think of cool new machines to invent for handspinners. I suggested a couple of innovations I’d like to see, and a couple places where I thought there was market potential; he and I are going to correspond periodically, and I’m also introducing him to Nels Wiberg, maker of the Babe Fiber Starter (a spinning wheel made of PVC pipe (!)).

I know Nels mainly because, a year or two ago, I tinkered extensively with his spinning wheel (it taught me more physics than three years at Caltech), and sent him a long list of suggestions. He’s quite a character; unfortunately he lives in Michigan, so I’ve never had a chance to meet him. Maybe someday, if I make it by there on my perambulations. At any rate, I think he’d get along with another mad scientist, so I’m introducing them. It should be neat to see what happens. 😉

Mr. Wu also took me off to his spinning factory in the southern suburbs of Bangkok–now *that* was neat. They have a series of giant machines that take acrylic fiber from raw puffs to finished yarn. First they pick it into fluffy clouds with one machine, then they blow it through a giant pipe to another machine, where it’s carded. (It was really neat watching the carded roving come off in a paper-thin sheet 60″ wide–then it goes through a little funnel-thing and presto! it’s a thick rope 1.5″ across. Magic!) After that they comb it, draw it out into a very thin strand, and then use a series of different-speed rollers to draft it out and feed it into a series of ring spindles, which simultaneously twist and wind on the singles (unplied) yarn.

Then, workers take the filled spindles (which are maybe 1.5″ in diameter, fully wound) and dump them into a machine which winds the small spindles into giant cones of yarn. Finally, one machine plies the singles together into finished yarn, and the last one winds the finished yarn into skeins for dyeing. All this is fully automated, with rows upon rows of spindles rolling at high speed, automatic feed in most places, and the factory runs 24 hours a day, outputting 28 tons of yarn seven days a week, 351 days a year. (The fourteen remaining are national holidays.)

Anyway, after looking at the long series of giant green machines automated for everything under the sun, I looked at my humble little homemade drop spindle, with hand-shaped clay whorl, and considered just how far technology’s come. I wonder how many skilled spinners it would take to create 28 tons of fine yarn in just one day. Geez.

On the other hand, tools aren’t everything; I bought a book on Lao textiles that shows them using a primitive backstrap loom to weave the most incredible pieces. I feel guilty now for having so many high-tech toys; they’re working with human ingenuity and almost nothing else, and they produce weaving far finer than I’ll ever manage. Of course, they also spend their lives at it (there’s the downside to an artisan culture).

Anyway–Ko Chang is an island off the SE coast of Thailand (on the peninsula that leads down to Malaysia), supposed to be considerably less developed/spoiled than Ko Samui (“Ko” in Thai means “island”, in case you hadn’t guessed). Most of the island is a national park, but development is, sadly, continuing apace regardless. Thailand has a severe conservation problem, has only 10% of its forest left, and is widely expected to lose that within the next thirty years.

Anyway, I’m not sure if I’ll have email there; accommodations are apparently a choice of fan-cooled concrete bungalows and open bamboo huts, so we’re not talking the world’s highest-tech connection there. Nonetheless, I give at least 50-50 odds that there’s at least one cybercafe on the island (in which case, you know I’ll find it within my first thirty minutes on the island–major email junkie here 😉 ).

I’m told that the best way to acclimate to the tropics is to stay in a room without air conditioning, so your body acclimates to the heat. I’m highly dubious at best (this sounds much like “Well, you’ll be sore all over for the entire AIDS Ride, but it won’t bother you after awhile”)–but since it looks like I won’t have much choice–well, we’ll see.

(As it happens, I *did* feel like hell most mornings of Lifecycle, and in fact it didn’t bother me. I think it’s because there’s nothing you can do about it–you’re going to feel like an arthritic 90-year-old no matter what you do–so you just get used to it.)

I have no real clue how I’m going to get to Ko Chang–all I know is that it’s a five hour bus ride and you have to change buses at some town near the coastline, then take a boat across the water–but I figure i’ll get there eventually. Or not, in which case I’ll simply find another place to stay/wander. The wonderful thing about having no set schedule is, if you don’t make it to a particular place, it’s no big deal–to quote Buckaroo Banzai, “Wherever you go, there you are.” I have yet to have problems finding interesting trouble, wherever I happen to be. 🙂

So, yesterday I got up in the morning (a change from my recently-nocturnal habits) and made it down to the Snake Farm, aka the Pasteur Institute, where they produce antivenin for most of Southeast Asia. They also, not coincidentally, put on live cobra-catching and venom-milking shows for the tourists (70 baht, about $1.75), and keep a number of the larger/showier nonvenomous for “educational” purposes, i.e. display.

The show itself was pretty riveting–they started by bringing out a live king cobra (ten or twelve feet long!) and letting it loose, about six feet away from where the latecomers were sitting on the floor (!). The cobra immediately slithered for cover, but the lecturer waved a boot right in front of it (!) and it instantly reared into cobra “threat” pose–straight up, hood flared, and hissing like anything.

It was quite impressive–nothing like a rattlesnake, which draws itself up into a spring coil and clearly threatens. When a cobra’s in threat position, you might as well have stuck a steel rod down its spine, ninety degrees to the ground; it looks alert, and ready to strike, but not actively threatening. (Well, not to me, anyway. Your mileage may vary. 😉 ) It doesn’t have the jittery look and muscle quiver of a threatening rattlesnake, it just pulls itself straight up and looks at you, quite calmly, secure in the knowledge that it could kill you in three minutes if it really felt like it. (Come to think of it, I’ve met some people like that in corporate life. 😉 )

Anyway, the speaker continued talking, moving his feet periodically to avoid the snake, explaining about antivenin production, horse farms, and how the cobra in front of him produces a highly neurotoxic venom can kill within a few minutes. From time to time the snake would calm down, unflare its hood, and start looking for cover; at which point he’d stamp in front of it and bring it into threat position again.

It took me a little while to realize that this wasn’t just to please the tourists, but a *protective* maneuver–cobras, in general, can’t move forward while they’re threatening. (They flatten their neck ribs to create the “hood” and hold the top eighteen inches of their body absolutely vertical, which is hard to do while moving.) So, you’re safe with a hooded cobra, as long as you stay out of striking range. You only have to worry once it unhoods and can move. (Of course, there is one species of cobra that *can* move forward while threatening–I think it’s either the king or Siamese cobra–so don’t count on that, either.)

Also, because cobras only strike straight forward and down, if you’re eighteen inches away it can only hit you in the top of the foot–and he was wearing boots. (I carefully filed all those bits away in case I ever run into one–although, like all snakes they are apparently quite shy and tend to avoid humans.) Nonetheless, I was quite amazed that he could stand so calmly, less than twenty-four inches away from a quite thoroughly “loose” (and strike-poised) cobra. I wouldn’t do that with a rattlesnake no matter how “tame” it was–but I gather cobras are more predictable.

Anyway, he continued talking–from time to time, the snake would calm down, whereupon a handler would reach out and stroke the snake’s back (!) to make it threaten again. Eventually, one handler demonstrated catching the snake…waved a booted foot in front of it to catch its attention, got it to attempt a strike, then snagged the back of the head in one lightning move, held it, and bowed to the crowd.

They then brought out a glass petri dish, pried open the snake’s mouth, and pressed the fangs down on the dish. I’m not sure how the mechanism works, but that “milks” the venom, even though it doesn’t unfold the fangs–cobras (and virtually all front-fanged venomous snakes) have hinged fangs, that drop down from the roof of the mouth as the jaw opens. Neat to watch, though.

Anyway, eventually they had a few droplets of clear venom on the petri dish, which they passed around to show us. It didn’t look like anything in particular, but it did demonstrate that the guy really had been standing there with a fully-venomed cobra right in front of him. (I had thought it might be a freshly-milked cobra, which would have been relatively safe.) Okay, I’m impressed. 🙂

After that they brought out a number of other snakes, including the Siamese cobra, which is much smaller and much less calm than the king cobra–the three they brought out (holding them by the tails!) hissed and struck repeatedly at the handler standing right in front of them (just out of range), teasing them for the cameras. I took some photos but don’t know if any of them caught the strikes, they’re pretty fast.

I get the impression, generally, that cobras are actually *less* dangerous than most other deadly snakes, because their behavior is so predictable: they only strike forward (unless stepped on), their strike pattern is predictable, and they don’t move forward while threatening. I’m not volunteering for cobra-handling, though, you understand.

After the demo with the Siamese cobras, a guy brought out a pair of banded kraits–quite pretty with dark blue and yellow striping, they don’t *look* like one of the most dangerous snakes in Asia. I was quite astonished that he was simply cradling the two kraits in his arms, and letting them crawl (slowly) over him; that violates every tenet of venomous snake handling as far as I know, especially deadly ones. But banded kraits are apparently quite docile during the day…it’s only at night that they become dangerous. The snakes did seem pretty lethargic, so maybe there’s something in that.

I did notice that the black-and-white banded krait looks an awful lot like the standard black/white California kingsnake. Mental note: suppress the “ooh, a snake, catch it!” reflex while in Asia. It’s NOT what you think it is. 😉

After the show, I went wandering through their collection. They have a great display of king cobras–which are really quite nondescript tan snakes, twelve to fifteen feet long, until they raise their hood. They’re damn fast, though–I saw one by the wall, went over for a closer look, and instantly I found myself facing a flared and hissing cobra, less than six inches from my nose. Dang, that’s a memorable experience, even from behind a metal screen.

Later, I passed a cage stuffed full of reticulated pythons, (maybe six or seven adults in a cage way too small–I felt sorry for them). Then I saw a head poking out from under the cage–a full-grown retic, as far as I could see. (Reticulated pythons, if you didn’t know, are the longest snake in the world (the anaconda is the heaviest), maxing out somewhere between 20 and 30 feet, I think.)

Anyway, it didn’t look like it was in very good shape (skin hanging off from a poor shed) and I was crouching closer to get a better look. Then it dawned on me that the head was *under* the cage, not in it, i.e. the rest of the snake was probably under the cage, not in it, i.e. the thing was loose.

Oh.

So, I got up and went off to find one of the handlers, and explained to him that one of his retics was loose. He came by, looked at it, went off for backup, and eventually I got to watch, very amused, as three people dragged a very large python out from under the cage with a snake hook, threw a burlap bag over its head, and shoved it back in the cage (it took two people to carry it, it was so big!). I didn’t understand why they bothered with the snake hook and bag, until they popped open the cage and suddenly six or seven full-grown, giant pythons were awake, hissing, and striking at the handlers as they tried to pop the eighth one in. At this point it dawned on me that, unlike the retics I’m used to seeing, these *hadn’t* been handled regularly since birth, and I’d been standing with my toes about eighteen inches from an essentially wild, fully-grown reticulated python.

Oh.

About ten minutes after I left the snake farm, it dawned on me that if they had a reticulated python loose from its cage (we are not talking a small snake here, folks), they might actually have “lost” some of their other snakes, too.

Oh.

Well, it’s a good thing I watched where I put my feet, that’s all I have to say.

Anyway, after that I tried going to the Chao Praya Cultural Center, but couldn’t figure out how to get the ferry across the river. After half an hour of tedious miscommunication with the ferry attendants, I gave up, went home, and took a nap.

Later I went for dinner with Kaew, a Thai woman I’d met Tuesday, at the expat bar–she introduced me to her friend at the AIDS NGO. He gave me some information packets, we chatted for a bit, and we agreed that I’d come by Monday to talk to some European expat staff (better English). But they have a very interesting project–it’s basically a corporate outreach program, where companies send their employees to AIDS education seminars in exchange for reductions on their corporate life/health insurance rates. I don’t think the concept would fly in the U.S., as employee turnover is significantly higher (and infection isn’t as commonplace), but I like the idea.

After dinner, Kaew and I went off to Khao San Road to meet Nima (Ben’s cousin), her sister, and an American movie producer named John, who’s in town for two weeks for the Thai film festival. Khao San Road is the backpacker’s Mecca, and I’m now VERY glad I’m not staying there–Bob Marley T-shirts, woven-bead necklaces, and funky purses, need I say more? But it was good to see the place, I may have to see a travel agent there.

I did feel pretty twitchy while we were hopping through the dance clubs on Khao San Road, though; there are terrorism alerts all through Southeast Asia right now, and I was pretty intensely aware that I was standing in the number one target in Thailand–the trendy nightclubs in the prime tourist district (exactly the places that got blown up in Bali). On the other hand, given that there’s a sniper running around DC shooting people right now, I don’t think there’s anywhere that’s truly safe. And Thailand is not a Muslim country. I am thinking I will skip overlanding through Malaysia and Indonesia, though I may still go to Bali. (With tourism already devastated, it’s unlikely IMO there’ll be other attacks, so it might be the safest place to be.) Haven’t decided yet.

Plans for today include the Weekend Market (which is supposed to be a must-see, a giant flea market that sells *everything*), and maybe either a Thai massage or a conversation with Buddhist monks. Sunday I’m lunching with Wu, a 63-year-old Chinese man whom I’ve never met, but who’s read my posts on the handspinners’ list and (I kid you not) wants me to teach him how to spin silk into thread on the drop spindle I brought along. Since he only speaks Mandarin and I only speak English, this should be pretty interesting, but I imagine the language of craft is universal.

Sunday, Kaew and I are going for dinner–I’m helping her break into the social scene here (which is a laugh, since I just got here) in exchange with help on one of my other little projects, and some general help sightseeing.

Monday, after stopping by the AIDS NGO, I’ll be heading to Ko Chang (beaches + rainforest hiking)–I’m getting a little burnt out on the American-expat bar scene, and also starting to feel a little too settled-in. Much of the point of this trip is to get a chance to try out different cultures and reflections, so while it’s good that I have a firm “home base” in Bangkok, it’s time to go poke elsewhere. I don’t want to get stuck in a rut, after all. 😉

Oh yes–almost forgot to mention–I’ve been invited to two expat parties in Bangkok week after next, one big one on the 26th (hosted by Nima) and one on the 28th (hosted by a friend of Kaew’s). So I’ll be wheeling back through Bangkok for that, then probably up north to Chiang Mai, home of craft artisans and silkweavers. Though I don’t know; Nima’s sister mentioned that there’s a temple in southern Thailand that does excellent vipanassa meditation retreats starting on the 1st of every month, so I may take some time and do that, too.

Oh, and Nima mentioned that the best body-painter in Bangkok will be at the party on the 26th. I have GOT to talk to this guy. (Actually I have more nefarious plans, but I’m not going to tell you what they are. I figure you can have much more fun trying to figure out what I might be up to, than you’d have if I actually explained. 😉 )

Off to the Weekend Market!

Just a quick note to say that I may be changing my plans for visiting Myanmar–apparently two bombs went off on Tuesday in the town near the border (the same day the Burmese government reopened it–it’s been shut since May), and they found ten more bombs there yesterday. They suspect one of the splinter Karen nationalist armies is doing it, trying to re-close the border. (They controlled the illegal border crossing point, so got revenue while the border was closed.) The Karen are a hilltribe the Burmese government has been persecuting; lots of them are displaced across to the Thai side, where the Thai government doesn’t want them either, so they’re mostly living in refugee camps.

Of course, from my point of view, I’m less interested in the politics than the bombs. (Not that the politics isn’t interesting–but there’s something compelling about bombs where you’re traveling.) If I go to Burma, I think I’ll fly in.

Nothing yesterday, because I slept all day. The last four days of frenetic activity plus jet lag finally caught up to me. 🙂

I did, however, find Asia Books, so now I have a bunch of field guides to animals, plants, etc. in Thailand. Monday I head south, to Ko Chang.

First, let me say that 44 baht = 1 dollar–that will save me a lot of translation in subsequent epistles. (I assume 40 baht = $1, for the sake of convenience.)

Well, I got a late start today, as I didn’t wake up until 5pm. I spent some time reading through the guidebook trying to plan, then decided to hell with it, I was going to go explore Bangkok and leave the guidebook for when I got back. So I went by the tailor for a final fitting on the clothes I ordered yesterday (the workmanship is exquisite and I feel guilty about dragging custom-made, high-quality cashmere pants and silk blouses through the jungles of Asia, but), then struck out in the general direction of Siam Central. Main goals for the evening:

(1) practice bargaining,

(2) find the scorpion vendor again, and

(3) poke my nose through the red-light district.

I ate at a couple food stalls on the way–these are dingy, battered little carts about the size of an ice cream cart, each equipped with a little charcoal brazier and a grill/wok/whatever. Each stall only makes one dish–noodles, grilled beef, fried grasshoppers, etc.–but they cluster in groups of five or six, so you can shop a few food stalls and get a reasonably varied menu, then eat it at a communal table. The limited menu at each stall is actually an advantage for clueless foreigners–you can just point, and ask how much, and take whatever they’re cooking. (If you don’t recognize it, don’t ask; I mean, why court trouble by finding out that delicious food was actually maggots?)

Needless to say, the hygienic conditions for these stalls aren’t the best (no refrigeration), but since cooking kills all nasties, it’s basically safe as long as it’s freshly cooked. Which it is. And, very tasty, and very cheap. 2 grilled beef skewers, a barbecued chicken leg, and a bowl of noodles ran me 65 baht (about $1.50)–I could probably have bargained that down by about 10%, but had a hard time convincing myself to do them out of the extra fifteen cents–these people aren’t completely impoverished by Thai standards, but fifteen cents is real money to them, which it isn’t to us. (I have another philosophical discourse on money and the relative value of labor, but I’ll can it for now.)

The guy with the beef skewers had a very interesting cart (I took a picture)–it had the back half of a bicycle grafted onto one end. The interesting part is, the cart makes up the *front* of the bike–it’s not attached to the back via tow hitch. I guess he uses the cart as handlebar/steering, and puts the cart up front so he can keep an eye on it/better negotiate Bangkok traffic.

(No, I am NOT riding a modified food cart on AIDS Lifecycle…though I’m sure that I could make myself the most popular rider next year by riding one, and filling it with Popsicle bars. )

Anyway, Silom was closed, so I went down to Patpong, one of the red-light districts. Patpong is stuffed with street vendors, so I spent some time drifting around and practicing bargaining. They really have honed scamming tourists to an art–on the main road, for example, a low-grade silk scarf was priced at 250 baht (I got them down to 175, but didn’t buy), but the minute you entered the red-light district, the same scarf was priced at 550 baht (!). I watched a Dutch (?) woman bargain that scarf down to 350 baht, then go off happily convinced she’d gotten a good deal. Moral of the story: never buy until you’ve walked away from at least three vendors (that–roughly–gives you their lowest price), and buy as far away from tourist districts as you can. I suppose that’s no different from any other city.

Anyway, I wound up buying a black rayon wraparound skirt for 250 baht (I think I still paid too much)–the seller swore it was silk, but if it’s not rayon, I’ll eat my sewing machine (see previous note re the fine art of scamming tourists). Of course, no way could I have gotten silk for 250 baht, so I’m not too upset.

I also got a black handbag, which I’ve decided will be my “stealth daypack” for walking around the city. I’ve noticed that while I don’t look Thai, as long as I’m not advertising myself as a tourist (backpack, camera, etc.) I can “pass” reasonably well–which means I don’t get hassled much by tuktuk drivers, sex-show touts, etc. A handbag is also a nice distractor for pickpockets–it’s big and obvious, so they’re likely to target it first, rather than my pockets. I really don’t care if I lose my water bottle.

Anyway, I’m pretty convinced I paid too much for the purse (beginners’ mistake), but at 300 baht I don’t think I overpaid by more than 50-100 ($1.25-2.50), which is not going to kill me.

I also bought a bronze three-headed elephant, just for the hell of it. i have absolutely no idea what I’m going to do with a three-headed elephant, but I’m sure one of my friends needs one. I also have no clue why someone would *sell* a little bronze three-headed elephant–I suspect it’s a Hindu Ganesh of some sort, but can’t really say. But what the hell, i got it, and it was good practice.

After the shopping spree, I went poking through the red-light district, looking for Dream Boys. Nima had helpfully pointed out Dream Boys on the way to the scorpion vendor, and described it as “the best male sex show in Bangkok”, so I poked my nose inside. She had also warned me that if I went by myself I’d be instantly deluged, which turned out to be true–thirty seconds after I sat down there were five dancers “coincidentally” sitting on the bench next to me. Apparently about half the male strippers/prostitutes in Bangkok are actually straight (“flipping” preferences to make money), so single women are very, very popular.

I spent some time trying to convince them that really, no, I was just looking, but couldn’t convince them to stop, um, getting friendly, until I explained that I had a boyfriend back in the States (sorry about that, Jim). After that they (mostly) kept their hands to themselves, though they still liked talking to me.

Anyway, to kill the suspense, the show was in fact very good as sex shows go–but the highlight, at least for me, was the one where they came out in UV body paint, lit with blacklights. One had a gorgeous scorpion down his chest, one had an owl, and one had a phoenix–very masterfully done. I want to talk to their body painter. If I could con him into teaching me how to paint, I could have a LOT of fun at Burning Man–I bought a set of Kryolan Brandel UV body paints for Burning Man last year, but don’t really know how to use them. This guy is *good*. I want to talk to him.

The only weird part in the whole thing was that at the beginning, all the guys stand on the stage in white G-strings with numbers attached, moving one spot down the line every twenty seconds or so (sort of a moving menu). Apparently, if you see a guy you like, you give his number to a waiter, and he comes over and sits next to you. I gather the female brothels work the same way–I can’t think of anything more dehumanizing/offputting, personally (think “meat market”), but then, I’m not their target customer.

Anyway, after I made it clear I was just looking, I wound up striking up a conversation with two of the dancers. One of them actually spoke decent English, and offered to show me around the city “as friends”–so I got his phone number, and am seriously considering it. Needless to say he’s probably looking for a “sugar momma” or something similar, but (a) I wanted to talk to a prostitute about life in the sex trade, and here he is; (b) he probably knows the guy who does the body paint; (c) he probably knows some of the “working girls” (or knows someone who does), so might be able to introduce me.

(For the record, the guy is (a) not my type, and (b) I wouldn’t be interested even if he were. I admit cheerfully to having a taste for adventure, and a high risk tolerance, but it emphatically does NOT extend to having sex with a male prostitute in the AIDS capital of Asia. I’d rather be shot at; the odds are better, IMO. (In the U.S., you have a 90% chance of surviving a gunshot wound, even if the guy gets lucky and hits you.))

anyway, I’m going to see what of my other feelers pan out, but if it looks like nothing else is doing I may try calling this guy and negotiating. I have no idea what his “rates” are, or what the house’s “cut” is, but I can always find out…and it wouldn’t hurt to have a native guide to teach me the finer points of bargaining, a few Thai phrases, and so on. I admit it’s a rather unorthodox way to find one, but I’ve never been much on orthodoxy to begin with. I promise I will NOT let the guy drug my drink, pick my pocket, steal my stuff, etc., though. (I read up on all those scams before setting out, too.) I’ll probably ask Nima about it, too, just in case. she’s been pretty good about pitfalls thus far, and she seems to know that “house” pretty well–as I’d expect: she writes travel guides for a living, so it’s her business to know these things.

(If you’re wondering why I’m considering paying this guy for conversation–it’s because his livelihood depends on people paying him for his time. It’s rude IMO to take up the time of a working professional without compensation, regardless of what that profession is.)

Oh yes–the elephant. On the way back, I was walking along the street trying to find a moving taxi (Nima helpfully told me to avoid parked taxis, as they’re almost universally crooks), and I passed an elephant! It was a very small elephant, about chest-height on me (four feet or so), and very cute, accompanied by two mahouts. They sold me a little banana for twenty baht–I offered it to the elephant, and it picked it up with its trunk and ate it. It was incredibly cute. I took a few photographs with the digital, not sure how they’ll come out. (Tomorrow morning I install software and try to get stuff downloaded. Really.)

I also passed by a stall where a guy was doing tattoos by hand–very neat to watch. He had a long bamboo pen-like thing in his hand, and was dipping the needle into several tiny pots of ink and pricking the tattoo in by hand. I took two photos and was horribly embarrassed when the flash went off on the second one (I had set it to no-flash override, or so I thought)–but I did get one good shot, anyway. I apologized profusely and scuttled off.

On the way back, I did flag down a moving taxi but the guy still tried to charge me 100 baht for a 55-baht fare home (wouldn’t turn on his meter). I said no thanks, got out, fended off the four touts and tuktuk drivers who immediately deluged me (“You need taxi, ma’am?”), and stalked off a block and a half, where I managed to flag an honest taxi. (Hard to imagine that two days ago I was absolutely terrified of boarding a bus. It seems pretty surreal to me, now.)

Oh–I almost forgot–in the back of a small shopping center, I found this metalworker who does the most INCREDIBLE art. He has a life-size See-Threepio and R2D2, all done in incredibly detailed, welded bronze (?–not sure if it’s really bronze). He also has an alien from Aliens, done in scrap metal, bicycle chains, etc.–also very beautiful. Unfortunately, there was a sign saying “No photography” or I would have taken photos to share–he also had smaller pieces that were equally exquisite, but at 12,000 baht each ($300, probably $250 with bargaining) they were out of my range. I did get a business card, I may want to try calling and buying something after I start working again. His work really is beautiful.

That’s all for tonight–it’s now 5am here, so I’m off to bed. Tomorrow I’ll see what today’s “feelers” have produced, and maybe do a walking tour of Chinatown. Alternately, there’s a hotel that has cool Thai dance stuff going on for free, and it’s next door to the Population Development Agency, which runs one of the biggest anti-AIDS programs in Thailand.